Monday, February 17, 2014

The Path Of True Love

What holiday celebrates true love better than Valentine's day?

Every year on February 14th in the US and many other places people celebrate Valentine's day.  Have you ever wonder exactly where all of these customs for Valentine's day came from and why it is associated with the path of true love?

While there are many sources for the customs of Valentine's day and how it came to be celebrated as a day of romance none of them are the sufficient by themselves to explain all of the customs.  A good place to start untangling the mess is by recognizing that Valentine's day is a religious holiday for commemorating Saint Valentine.

This is not as easy as one might hope. 

In fact, there were people named Valentine who lived at different times and places that are commemorated on different days on different religious calendars.  They were all martyred in various places during a three hundred year span of time that went from 197 AD to 496 AD.  They were given various days of commemoration on different religious calendars.  Saint Valentine of Rome was given February 14th on the Catholic calendar because that was the day that this Roman Catholic priest was martyred in 496 AD.  (This is not the Valentine that was martyred during the reign of Claudius II (268 AD - 270 AD) for supposedly performing marriage ceremonies.) 

All of these people known as Saint Valentine, some who are commemorated on different days on different calendars, has added to the confusion. This has lead people to confuse which Valentine's Day is being referred to in various historical records that contain various customs that were associated with Valentine's Day long ago.

For example, it is known that the customs associated with the Saint Valentine that is mention in one ancient text is the Saint Valentine whose day is May 3rd even though people have assumed that it was the Saint Valentine whose day is February 14th.  The various Saint Valentine day festivals originally marked various agricultural events like the first day of planting and the first day of working in the vineyards for about a thousand years.  Valentine's Day originally had nothing to do with the path of true love.

Valentine's day was not associated with romance until Chaucer associated it with birds mating in a poem he wrote in 1382 AD. (It is unclear which Valentine's day he was referring to but the one associated with February 14 became the popular assumption.)  After that various customs of Pagan origin associated with sexual love began to be associated with February 14.  These practices had been carried out on different dates and in different locations until they all began to be rolled into the celebration Valentine's day on February 14th.

Many of these customs were also tamed in some regards.  For example, one custom in the middle ages was for young men to draw out the names of young women written on cards from a box and then the two were to have sex with each other (and perhaps be married although that is uncertain).  This was the origin of the Valentine's box.

A Roman holiday that may have been the source of the various Medieval customs that became modern day customs associated with Valentine's day was Lupercalia. During this holiday young men in ancient Rome would participate in the sacrifice of two male goats and a dog to Pan (the god of sex and wild parties).  They would then smear the blood of the goats on their foreheads and laugh.  They would then take two thongs made from the shaggy skin of the goats (often with blood all over them) and run a course through the streets of Rome naked.  The young women of Rome who wanted to either have an easy pregnancy or to get pregnant would get in the way of with their hands facing palm up to receive a slap on the wrist from the naked runners.  This festival was celebrated every year from February 13th through February 15th.  The only definite connection between the two is that a Catholic priest named Saint Valentine was martyred in the middle of the last observation of Lupercalia (February 14th) before it was outlawed by Pope Gelasius I in that same year.  The red associated with Valentine's day might have its origin in the blood that smeared on the foreheads of the runners, or the red marks that the bloody thongs left on the wrists of the women or the blood of Saint Valentine that was shed when he was martyred on that day.

An even older Roman custom than any of these was the heart shape.  The heart shape came from the heart shaped seeds of a plant called Silphium.  These seeds would both raise the desire for sex in women while also inhibiting their ability to get pregnant.  The Silphium plant was harvested into extinction by the Romans but the heart shape of its seeds has remained as a symbol of sexual love.  So people would give each other heart shaped objects instead of Silphium seeds in the hopes that they could somehow get the same results as eating the Silphium seeds.

The small naked children with wings known as cupids also came from Roman pagan beliefs.  The Romans believe that these spirits would cause people to fall in love with each other.  People would decorate cards with pictures of cupids to show that they had been smitten by a cupid and were now in love with the recipient.

All of these absurd practices were carried out because people wanted to find the path of true love.

It was not until the 1700s that English merchants began inducing people to celebrate Valentine's day (February 14th) with chocolates, flowers and cards.  This caught on because many people thought that this was the path of true love.

Today, many couples in America still follow these same English traditions along with some American traditions.  They have added, dressing up in formal clothing, going out to fancy restaurants to eat dinners by candle light, drinking champagne, and dancing to the list.  Often there are other gestures of romance as well because they think that this is the path of true love.

However, the Book of Truth (The Bible) tells of another holiday that really celebrates the path of true love.  During this holiday the story of Esther is read who understood and showed how to really walk in the path of true love.

The first thing to know about Esther was that her parents did not name her Esther and that she was Jewish.  Her birth name was Hadassah but her parents died so she was raised by her cousin Mordecai (Esther 2:5-7).

Like most Jewish girls she probably dreamed of one day marrying a fine Jewish man.  Since she was Godly she undoubtedly wanted to marry a Godly man as well.  Perhaps she hoped to marry someone who was like her cousin Mordecai.  However, she soon found herself in circumstances beyond her control that would shatter those dreams.

The queen of Persia, Vashti, had refused to show herself off to the drunken guests of Ahasuerus as he had commanded (Esther 1:10-12).  So after consulting with his advisers, Ahasuerus vanished Vashti from the royal city of Shushan and began to look for someone better to serve as queen that would not disrespect him by not obeying his commands - no matter how humiliating the command was (Esther 1:13-21).  So people were sent throughout the Persian Empire, that stretched from India to Ethiopia, to round up all of the most beautiful virgins from each of the 127 provinces to be brought to the royal harem so Ahasuerus could select one of them to be his new queen (Esther 2:2-4).  Hadassah was among those that were selected (Esther 2:8).  However, Mordecai had commanded her to not let anyone know that she was Jewish (Esther 2:10).

Now Ahasuerus was the furthest thing from what Hadassah had wanted in a husband.  Ahasuerus was full of pride (Esther 1:1-4). Ahasuerus was given to getting drunk and overeating (Esther 1:5-10).  Ahasuerus had already showed that he expected his spouse to do whatever he said and that he had a temper (Esther 1:12).  Ahasuerus and the princes of Persia believed that he was a god in the flesh so he could not alter any commandment once he gave it because that would be admitting that he had made a mistake - what an ego! (Esther 1:19).  Ahasuerus was involved with many other women (Esther 2:12-14).  Worst of all, Ahasuerus was not Jewish, did not know about the Law of Truth (Torah aka The Law) and thus was not circumcised (Esther 3:8).

The Law of Truth said that Hadassah was not supposed to marry anyone that worshiped idols (Deuteronomy 7:3-4). Yet she was forced to marry Ahasuerus with absolutely no say in the matter.  How could Hadassah hope to find the path of true love in these circumstances?

Well, she could have tried to get out of the marriage before she lost her virginity to Ahasuerus.  If she had refused to go to him then she might have been vanished from Shushan like Vashti and still had her virginity intact.  She could then look for a Godly husband that was more to her liking.

Another option was for her to go ahead and lose her virginity to him but to only do the bare minimum required.  A frigid performance would make her forgettable to man with many wives.  She would then continue to be pampered in the palace while never having to give herself over to Ahasuerus again (Esther 2:13-14).

However, Hadassah chose the path of true love.  She understood that this had happened to her because her people had not showed love to the Father of Truth (YHVH aka God aka THE LORD) by obeying the Law of Truth (Deuteronomy 28:32).

She had already been on the path of true love because she had not given husband benefits to anyone before she was married (Esther 2:2).  She changed her name to Esther (which means "sex goddess") before she was introduced to her husband (Esther 2:7).  Then she formed a relationship with someone who knew what her husband liked (Esther 2:8-9). She found out what clothing pleased her husband and wore it when she went to meet him in the wedding chamber (Esther 2:15).  Esther did everything that pleased her husband in their wedding bed (Esther 2:16-17).

Ahasuerus had been more with more than 100 other women in that same marriage bed on different nights competing to become queen.  However her performance made Esther unforgettable because she had chosen the path of true love.  Since Esther had chosen the path of true love she became his queen (Esther 2:17-18).

Now Esther still had another chance to get out being married to someone that many of her people believed to be the wrong person.  When she was told by Mordecai that people had intended to kill Ahasuerus she could have simply not warned him.  Instead of looking for a way out of a less than ideal marriage, she continued to walk on the path of true love.  So she told her husband that Mordecai had sent a warning to her and saved her husband from the plot (Esther 2:21-23). 

However, there was soon trouble in paradise.  Ahasuerus, her husband, promoted a man named Haman to second in command (Esther 3:1).  Mordecai refused to bow down to him as Ahasuerus had commanded (Esther 3:2-4).  Haman hated all Jews because Mordecai refused to bow down to him (Esther 3:5-7).  So Haman sought to convince Ahasuerus to issue a decree that all of the Jews across the Persian empire were to be killed (Esther 3:8-9).  Ahasuerus did not look into the matter himself but rather issued a decree that all Jews, including Esther, should be killed based on the word of Haman (Esther 3:10-14).  Soon Esther learned that her husband had signed a decree to have her, her family and her people exterminated (Esther 4:5-9).  Worse yet, she was afraid to go to plead with her husband because he had been ignoring her for the last month and might kill her if she showed up uninvited (Esther 4:10-12).  However if she did nothing then she would be killed by the decree of her husband even though the Father of Truth would deliver the Jews in some other manner (Esther 4:13-14).

Needless to say this was an obstacle in the path of true love.  Esther may have been tempted to work with the enemies of her husband that were in the palace to kill him and Haman to bring an end to decree.  Instead she decided to continue to walk in the path of true love.

She first prepared herself by seeking the Father of Truth for three days in prayer and fasting before ever saying a word to her husband (Esther 4:15-17).  Then she showed up in his inner court uninvited and her husband was glad to see her (Esther 5:1-3)  Still she did not tell him what she wanted but instead invited him and Haman to a feast of his favorites foods (Esther 5:4). At the feast of food and wine she invited him and Haman to another feast before she would tell her husband what she wanted (Esther 5:5-8).  (Perhaps her husband saw fit to spend the night between feasts with Esther so she could take care of his other great appetite as well but it is not certain.)  It was only after the second feast when she had appeased his other great appetites, besides the one for sex, that she told her husband what she wanted (Esther 7:1-4).  She had continued to walk in the path of true love.

Her efforts to please her husband paid off.  His heart was now bound to hers.  Ahasuerus, who had a quick temper, was ready to kill Haman for tricking him into issuing a decree to have his wife killed (Esther 7:5-7).  When he thought Haman was trying to rape his wife then he had Haman killed (Esther 7:8-10).  He made Mordecai second in command because of his love for Esther (Esther 8:1-2).  His heart was now willing to give his attention to the concerns of his wife (Esther 8:3-6).  He issued a new decree that Jews could defend themselves and kill everyone in the Persian Empire that sought to harm any one that was part of the people of his wife (Esther 8:7-13).  Her husband would stop at nothing to defend Esther because he was now on the path of true love. 

So then the Feast of Purim was created to commemorate the deliverance that came from a woman who chose to walk in the path of true love even when her husband did not (Esther 9:20-22).  Purim is the holiday that really shows people the path of true love (Esther 9:29-32).

So you see that the path of true love is not determined by meeting or marrying the right person.  It is not determined by being in the ideal circumstances or by getting what you think is important.  It is not even based upon being treated right by your spouse.  The path of true love is the result of doing the right things regardless of everything else.

The path of true love can be walked by anyone that is willing to do so.  The Renewed Covenant (B'rit Chadashah aka the New Testament) gives many commands that will keep those that obey them on the path of true love.  These commands were all carried out by Esther before the Renewed Covenant was written because the same Spirit of Truth (Ruach HaQodesh aka The Holy Spirit aka The Holy Ghost) that wrote the Renewed Covenant wrote the Original Covenant (Tanak'h aka the Old Testament) and guided Esther on the path of true love.

The path of true love begins before marriage like it did with Esther.

Fornicators (those that have sex outside of marriage) will not live forever with the Man of Truth (Yeshua HaMashiach aka Jesus Christ) in the kingdom of His Father (1 Corinthians 6:9-10).  All fornicators will suffer forever with the Father of Lies (HaShatan aka Satan aka The Devil) in the Lake of Fire (Revelation 21:8).

The Children of Truth (those who show their love for the Father of Truth by obeying Him) who are unmarried and cannot keep their hands off each other are to get married because that is better than burning in Hell with fornicators (1 Corinthians 7:8-9).  They just need to know that there will be hard times in any marriage (1 Corinthians 7:28).  Still they are to get married if they are determined to have sex with each other (1 Corinthians 7:35-36). 

Like Esther, the Children of Truth are to be careful about who they marry.

The Children of Truth are told to not marry anyone that has been divorce for any reason except fornication (Matthew 5:32).  Those who do so are committing adultery against the spouse of the one they married because only adultery can break the bond of marriage (Matthew 19:9).  They are free from the bond of marriage however if their unbelieving spouse leaves them despite doing all that they could to please their unbelieving spouse (1 Corinthians 7:15). They are also free to remarry if their spouse dies (1 Corinthians 7:39-40).

The Children of Truth are told to not marry anyone that does not follow the Man of Truth (2 Corinthians 6:14).  The Children of Truth are told to only marry others that follow the Man of Truth (1 Corinthians 7:39).

Like Esther, the Children of Truth are to walk the path of true love no matter what their spouse is like.

The Children of Truth are to do all they can to completely fulfill the sexual appetite of their spouses so their spouses never need to look elsewhere (1 Corinthians 7:2-5).   The Children of Truth must to be willing to do all they can to please their spouses in every way that they can (1 Corinthians 7:32-34). 

The Children of Truth are commanded to not try to escape their marriage when things are not going well (1 Corinthians 7:10-11).  The Children of Truth are warned to not try to escape their marriage when their spouse is not one of the Children of Truth (1 Corinthians 7:12-14).  The Children of Truth are to show the same faithful to their unbelieving spouses that the Man of Truth has shown to them so that their unbelieving spouses might come into the House of Truth (1 Corinthians 7:15-16).  The Children of Truth are never to seek a divorce to escape a difficult marriage (1 Corinthians 7:27).

Instead wives are to submit to their husbands in everything to show how the Children of Truth are subject to the Man of Truth in everything (Ephesians 5:22-24).  Husbands are to love their wives and protect them with their lives (Ephesians 5:25).  Husbands are to love their wives even as the Man of Truth loves the Children of Truth (Ephesians 5:28-30).  Husbands are to love their wives as their own selves and wives are to show reverence to their husbands so the world can see the relationship between the Man of Truth and the Children of Truth (Ephesians 5:31-33).  Wives are to submit to their husbands and husbands are to love their wives instead of being bitter against them to show that they are the Children of Truth (Colossians 3:17-19).

Like Esther, they can win over their spouse by remaining on the path of true love.

The wife that walks the path of true love can get her husband to come into the House of Truth by her actions without ever saying a word to him about how he is living (1 Peter 3:1-2).  Like Esther understood, it is not the efforts to make one outwardly beautiful that will cause the heart of a husband to be bound to the heart of his wife but rather her showing him reverence by doing whatever he asks without arguing (1 Peter 3:3-6).

Sometimes husbands are like Ahasuerus and simply do not know how to really love their wives.
 
The husband needs to learn to how to live in understanding with his wife by showing her honor and protecting her as Ahasuerus finally learned to do with Esther (1 Peter 3:7)  It is having compassion on each other and doing everything to bless each other on a daily basis that is the path of true love (1 Peter 3:8-9).

The Father of Truth demonstrated true love when He gave His Son to die for us so we could come into the House of Truth while we were still not treating Him right (Romans 5:7-9).  You will walk the path of true love when you come into the House of Truth by submitting to the Man of Truth in everything because you believe that the Father of Truth raised him from the dead (Romans 10:8-10).  The Man of Truth demonstrated true love when he gave his life so people could come into the House of Truth (Ephesians 5:25-27).

Come into the House of Truth.


Labels: , , , , ,